Thursday, 30 May 2013

Letting Go

This is a kind of undercover philosophy.

To reach the stage where we must decide to Letting Go, it is needed a serial of facts that interact directly with our feelings, our way of life, or in the worst scenario, with our desire to keep going fighting the hours that conform our life without changes.

It seems unnecessary to mention the different kinds of conditions that can end in the need to face a Letting Go situation.

If the reason is of the lowest degree, you just open the hands and truly let it go.

The big decision comes when you find you are looking at an impossibility to choose in an intelligent way what to do in the occasion.

Sometimes, we think that a failure in being successful with a partner in love, when the time the decision comes after a long relationship, the longer, and if we are the dumped part, the worst, it seems more difficult to think in a total severance. But if we can separate our sense of self-pity, and wounded feelings, it is almost an easy thing to do, since it is the only moral and real determination that makes sense.

In other times. even simple things can be difficult to let go, that little Teddy that was our companion in childhood, the scarf Granny knitted for us, I can go on naming things that had engraved so deep in our personality that we feel they are part of us. Even those things must be considered as separated from our self, if we want to be real free.

The real problem is when the "Letting Go" does not resolve the equation: a really beloved person lost in situations where there is no coming back: terminal illnesses, drug dependency where there is no way to help, unsolvable cases of enmity between loved and important persons for us, to name only a few. There are more difficult instances, I am sure, only they are not coming to my mind at this moment.

This kind of situation asks for an unusual way of thinking from us. Sometimes, even if this idea may revolt us, there is no other way than just keep the field clear in the sense of preserving our own sanity, and it is a necessity to open a space between our reason and the element that is provoking a disruption in our psique. This may seem cruel, but sometimes there are no other solution to make sure we are following our path in life, since the other option is to lose everything, the other and oneself.

With this simple way to put a complicated matter, I think that the expression "Letting Go" should be deprived of  its dark nuances and faced with a clear mind, looking what is the best answer to all parts involved.

This seems the best way to follow, unfortunately, each time we reach the stage of "Letting go", the emotional situation, and the surrounding factors are usually conspiring against an intelligent, clear, and unemotional thought.

Some quotes trying to make clear this subject:

“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.”
- Ann Landers

“Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go but rather learning to start over.”
- Nicole Sobon

“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.”
- Steve Maraboli

"While you are considering several possibilities, they exist. The moment you choose one of them there is no others, nor is right to think "I may have chosen other thing". There is no 'other thing' but the one you chose."
- Od Liam

“There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.”
- Terry Pratchett

“I realise there's something incredibly honest about trees in winter, how they're experts at letting things go.”
- Jeffrey McDaniel

The music is a fragment of "Throw the Roses Away" by Hall & Oates. Besides the obvious reason to throw the roses away, the extreme ado of the music shows the emotional state of the poor being in the song.

© 2013 Od Liam.


  1. This post is an eye opener. I guess, at one point or another there's a dilemma to let go or not, depending on what situation. In my opinion, letting go could be the hardest thing to do, while on the other hand, it could be the one that benefit the person a lot in terms of freeing one's mind from stressful matters and getting out of difficult situation where emotions are concerned. Letting go doesn't mean losing but instead gaining freedom in seeing matters from many other perspectives.

    Yes, throw the roses away, as there are many beautiful ones elsewhere!

    I like all the quotes and I love most the one by YOU! Thank you, Od. :)

  2. If letting go means forgetting with the help of other parts, it seems easier, but if, out of the blue, you find there is no more attachment to the thing (or person) lost, you find it is an individual effort that demands all the strength in your core.

    You do not want to go ahead, but there is no other place to go, and you cannot stay quiet because the world annihilate you in its rush for the future.

    If, one finds a place to rest one's foots and push, as I did, then things are easier, I owe a lot to a friend who opened a door I have not seen in my distress.

    This is why I think all those thoughts are undercover philosophy. :))

    Thank you, BB! There are Roses everywhere, and once the choice is done, time freeze it! :)

    1. I understand your last line, Od. What I mentioned above are only meant for general matters. Thank you for your very nice reply. You never fail me! :)

    2. Thank you, for your ever present understanding, BB!

  3. I find it hard myself to say something here.

    You only understand this when you have been through a situation when "letting go" means loosing part of the soul - when starting over is an imposible ilusion because time is a tortuous eternity in front of you, empty and meaningless. Not "letting go" is destructive, and doing it is an inestimable renounce.

    At a point, I came to the same conclusion you state here in your text: there are no "ifs" in life. You take a desition, and it turns into fate: regreting about it only means loosing time in self-pity. And, unfortunately, time always goes forward, never backwards...

  4. You are right, in the way of sex, and war, we can only understand its innuendos, and those of "letting go", by sheer practice.

    This is the key to "keep going", a different, but equivalent phrase to "letting go". Sometimes, not even death seems the liberation gate. But even in our darker hours there is hope, only it is in such a disguise that, sometimes, one needs especial help to find it